HAILEYANELA

It's been roughly 2 months since my last blogging endeavor. A break, a sabbatical, a leave of absence; whatever you wanna call it, I was on it. It wasn't something that had any forethought or planning, it came naturally and of it's own accord. I had become so busy with school, my frantic job search (that proved rewarding), my sister's pending nuptials, & all the other little things that seem to weasel their way into my life. Unconsciously I began to loosen the reins on my sweet site, and now 8 weeks later, I'm oh so glad I did. I'm going to be so bold as to say that I think blogging is a talent of mine, albeit mediocre. But talents, no matter big or small, are detrimental in our discovery of ourselves. Talents are to be nursed and nurtured so that they may be developed and strengthened, but there is a fragile balance that demands to be had. To obsess and nitpick over every detail of that talent causes for feelings of insignificance and worthlessness, bo...

So I am fully aware that I am blatantly stealing the title of The Hobbit, but it just fits my situation so perfectly that I had to... Well as mentioned in my previous post I was becoming more committed to the idea of staying here over the summer and just working until I leave back up to school. But with the start of a new job comes a new attitude. This past weekend I had just started my employment with a local daycare, and I thought that I would absolutely love it. I had gone there way back when I was only a small nugget. But to my surprise and dismay I wholly disliked the job (that's putting it lightly). The people were great and the kids fun, but I just felt stuck. My thoughts regarding my job there were jumbled and lost, and it didn't sit right with me. Then I could feel myself drifting back to the idea of attending BYU in June for summer semester. As much as I was trying to keep my outlook of Henderson positive, I will openly admit to wanting to get away. I felt like I was...

When I was still in high school and I imagined college, the first thing that came to mind was: freedom. No curfew, living by my own rules, and no "checking in". I was pumped to be my own guardian and ruler... Ok I know that sounds a bit exaggerative, but I was so ready to fly from my nest and not look back. And let's be real now, my first year of college was all that and more. I had amazing roommates, a comfortable apartment complex, and the only time I was "checking in" was to make sure, what we had dubbed the "couch boat", was clear for a cuddling sesh. I had gotten use to the semi-restrictive rules that our school Honor Code enforced, but regardless I felt like I was living the dream. I felt a sense of independence and liberty that I had never experienced when I had lived at home. The feeling had given me a glimpse of what life after college offered, a look into the near future where I could come home to MY apartment where I made MY own rules... Bu...